movies

[Marky Dread]

The Monster Club (1981) Three mediocre anthology tales, with a wraparound that features Vincent Price hosting John Caradine in a night club that features rock bands (including the Pretty Things) play bad songs for their inhuman patrons. In the first story a woman thinks twice before robbing her ghoulish employer, then in a comedic segment, vampire hunters set their sights on a family man (featuring Donald Pleasence and Britt Eckland), and finally a film director finds himself in a foggy village populated with undead rock throwers. Directed by Hammer and Amicus vet, Roy Ward Baker.


I love Monster Club it's well in the so bad it's good file. But I love the corny spoof stories.

This track from the soundtrack is great fun.

"So the name 'Pretty Things' is supposed to be ironic?"
Mrs. 'pista

By the way, that song aside, I love the fucking Pretty Things, right?

Damn straight great band.

[tepista]

Porno (2019) This dangerous-to-google indie title is about five teenage movie theater employees who find an old film can after hours, and when they play it, it releases a sexy succubus. Lots of dick-ripping in this, and some good nudity from a very good looking succubus, but something about the whole churchy vibe and uninteresting characters threw me off this one. I really wanted to like this, and major kudos for nudity in a genre where that seems to be disappearing, but overall I’d say they missed the mark.

Madhouse (1974) Vincent Price is a horror actor who spent the last few years in an asylum after his fiancé was murdered by an assailant in the make-up of Dr. Death, the character he’s played in several movies. Now that his screenwriter (Peter Cushing) and producer (Count Yorga himself, Robert Quarry) want to re-start the series, the murders commence. Add a few pretty girls (Adrienne Corri of A Clockwork Orange, and Linda Hayden from Taste the Blood of Dracula, to name a few), and this is some good light fun, though not on the level of contemporary Price flicks like Theater of Blood or the Phibes movies.

Brahms: The Boy II (2020) The first one was surprisingly entertaining, and I’ll always give credit to William Brent Bell for directing the spectacular Wer, but Jesus Christ, this was one of the worst things I’ve seen in years. Boring Katie Holmes and her boring family of three move into a mansion after a home invasion and the kid finds the doll, blah blah blah, you’ve seen a hundred haunted doll movies already, right? What fucking family of three movies into a fucking mansion? And then a handful of suggested plot possibilities that go nowhere. The husband is accused of never being around, then that’s it. The home invasion looked personal, they never revisited it. The psychiatrist suggests she should come and visit in person, she doesn’t. It was like they were making it up as they went along and forgot things. Avoid this one, but you probably knew that already. Come on Mr. Bell, make Wer 2!

Blumhouse’s Fantasy Island (2020) Reboot of the 70s TV hit about a magical island that can make any dream come true, but usually with Monkey’s Paw type consequences. Yeah, sure, this was bad, but it wasn’t unwatchable. Some action, some horror-type violence, some bikini babes, all in lovely PG13. Michael Pena was Mr. Roarke. Also with Michael Rooker, Maggie Q, and a couple younger blonds who I’m not familiar with.

I had a free preview of premium cable last week, otherwise it's pretty unlikely i would have ever watched Brahms or Fantasy Island. Funny how you have no intention of watching something but then you do because it's free! Well, I also recorded Black Christmas and Cats, I might just delete those.

I also re-watced the Joe Bob Briggs "Dinners of Death" Thanksgiving special from 2018, including The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and The Hills Have Eyes, two classics that I can't even guess how many times I've seen

[tepista]

OK, everyone our age should love Cobra Kai, it;s in our genetics, so wife and I had never seen Karate Kid 2 or 3. 2 was a piece of shit, but 3m jesus christ. So the sensei goes to his before-now-unseen army buddy, who lives in a fucking mansion with multiple Rolls Royces and scores of servants who wait on him hand and foot while he counts money...anyway, he complains that an old man and a teenager embarrassed him and now he has no students, and the guy decides to go deep cover. He looks through a karate magazine and finds "karate's new bad boy" flies him in as a ringer to enter the all-valley tournament so he can beat Daniel-san, then he buys a pickup truck and normal (non-rich-people) clothes and inserts himself into Mr Miaygi and Daniel's lives, has his cronies commit attempted murder on Daniel and his GF, threaten to rape her so he enters the tournament (he wasnt going to) then tricks him into breaking up w/ GF, and dividing him with Miyagi so he can train with him, so he can intentionally injure him while training, then the day before the tournament he reveals his big evil plan with a HAHAHA like a cartoon villain, then he goes to the tornament and verbally abuses him in front of all the judges and no one says shit. these are minors, remember. So a MILLIONAIRE has time to take a month off to go undercover to long con an old man and a teenager he never met before and live in a karate studio while doing it instead of his mansion. Yeah.

[Dr. Medulla]

OK, everyone our age should love Cobra Kai, it;s in our genetics, so wife and I had never seen Karate Kid 2 or 3. 2 was a piece of shit, but 3m jesus christ. So the sensei goes to his before-now-unseen army buddy, who lives in a fucking mansion with multiple Rolls Royces and scores of servants who wait on him hand and foot while he counts money...anyway, he complains that an old man and a teenager embarrassed him and now he has no students, and the guy decides to go deep cover. He looks through a karate magazine and finds "karate's new bad boy" flies him in as a ringer to enter the all-valley tournament so he can beat Daniel-san, then he buys a pickup truck and normal (non-rich-people) clothes and inserts himself into Mr Miaygi and Daniel's lives, has his cronies commit attempted murder on Daniel and his GF, threaten to rape her so he enters the tournament (he wasnt going to) then tricks him into breaking up w/ GF, and dividing him with Miyagi so he can train with him, so he can intentionally injure him while training, then the day before the tournament he reveals his big evil plan with a HAHAHA like a cartoon villain, then he goes to the tornament and verbally abuses him in front of all the judges and no one says shit. these are minors, remember. So a MILLIONAIRE has time to take a month off to go undercover to long con an old man and a teenager he never met before and live in a karate studio while doing it instead of his mansion. Yeah.

Related:

[matedog]

OK, everyone our age should love Cobra Kai, it;s in our genetics, so wife and I had never seen Karate Kid 2 or 3. 2 was a piece of shit, but 3m jesus christ. So the sensei goes to his before-now-unseen army buddy, who lives in a fucking mansion with multiple Rolls Royces and scores of servants who wait on him hand and foot while he counts money...anyway, he complains that an old man and a teenager embarrassed him and now he has no students, and the guy decides to go deep cover. He looks through a karate magazine and finds "karate's new bad boy" flies him in as a ringer to enter the all-valley tournament so he can beat Daniel-san, then he buys a pickup truck and normal (non-rich-people) clothes and inserts himself into Mr Miaygi and Daniel's lives, has his cronies commit attempted murder on Daniel and his GF, threaten to rape her so he enters the tournament (he wasnt going to) then tricks him into breaking up w/ GF, and dividing him with Miyagi so he can train with him, so he can intentionally injure him while training, then the day before the tournament he reveals his big evil plan with a HAHAHA like a cartoon villain, then he goes to the tornament and verbally abuses him in front of all the judges and no one says shit. these are minors, remember. So a MILLIONAIRE has time to take a month off to go undercover to long con an old man and a teenager he never met before and live in a karate studio while doing it instead of his mansion. Yeah.

When I was like six, I loved all three of these.

[daredevil]

OK, everyone our age should love Cobra Kai, it;s in our genetics, so wife and I had never seen Karate Kid 2 or 3. 2 was a piece of shit, but 3m jesus christ. So the sensei goes to his before-now-unseen army buddy, who lives in a fucking mansion with multiple Rolls Royces and scores of servants who wait on him hand and foot while he counts money...anyway, he complains that an old man and a teenager embarrassed him and now he has no students, and the guy decides to go deep cover. He looks through a karate magazine and finds "karate's new bad boy" flies him in as a ringer to enter the all-valley tournament so he can beat Daniel-san, then he buys a pickup truck and normal (non-rich-people) clothes and inserts himself into Mr Miaygi and Daniel's lives, has his cronies commit attempted murder on Daniel and his GF, threaten to rape her so he enters the tournament (he wasnt going to) then tricks him into breaking up w/ GF, and dividing him with Miyagi so he can train with him, so he can intentionally injure him while training, then the day before the tournament he reveals his big evil plan with a HAHAHA like a cartoon villain, then he goes to the tornament and verbally abuses him in front of all the judges and no one says shit. these are minors, remember. So a MILLIONAIRE has time to take a month off to go undercover to long con an old man and a teenager he never met before and live in a karate studio while doing it instead of his mansion. Yeah.

When I was like six, I loved all three of these.

What I hated about Karate Kid 2 is it removed two great supporting characters, the quirky mother and Ali. Daniel and Ali looked good together and you didn't sense the same chemistry with the new girl. The movie seemed to move at a really slow pace and I didn't really care about the rivalry between Mr. Miyagi and Sato? (not sure if that is right). But the end fight was terrible, after Daniel fails with the famous move (which according to part 1, an opponent had no defense) he resorts to throwing a series of haymakers that resembled the actions of a toy drum with a ball (which was the secret to Miyagi Karate?

[tepista]

Daniel fails with the famous move (which according to part 1, an opponent had no defense)

If done correctly!

[Dr. Medulla]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

[daredevil]

Daniel fails with the famous move (which according to part 1, an opponent had no defense)

If done correctly!

Forgot about that part

[Kimmelweck]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

Bender would be the new Carl the janitor. Do I get the raccoon?

[Dr. Medulla]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

Bender would be the new Carl the janitor. Do I get the raccoon?

Talk to Olaf about that. I'm in the Wagers division, not Payouts.

(Judd Nelson might be an actual high school janitor these days, for all I know.)

[Kimmelweck]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

Bender would be the new Carl the janitor. Do I get the raccoon?

Talk to Olaf about that. I'm in the Wagers division, not Payouts.

(Judd Nelson might be an actual high school janitor these days, for all I know.)

You know what? In the spirit of Christmas, Olaf can keep his raccoon. Merry Christmas Olaf and Olaf!

[Dr. Medulla]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

Bender would be the new Carl the janitor. Do I get the raccoon?

Talk to Olaf about that. I'm in the Wagers division, not Payouts.

(Judd Nelson might be an actual high school janitor these days, for all I know.)

You know what? In the spirit of Christmas, Olaf can keep his raccoon. Merry Christmas Olaf and Olaf!

Somewhere in Bavaria, the lederhosen feels extra comfy tonight.

[JennyB]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

Yep. Aside from Ally Sheedy's character (who would never date that wrestler doofus in real life), the only other redeemable character from that movie is Carl.

[Kimmelweck]

Because I just read this book on The Breakfast Club, we're watching the movie this evening. With the exception of Ally Sheedy's character, I dislike those kids more and more every time. Whatever the bullshit about how they're all kids with common problems behind the stereotypes, they never really rise above the stereotypes to me. I want the cut where all the characters join in to murder Bender right at the start.

edit: I would bet Olaf's most prized raccoon (also named Olaf) that someone in Hollywood has pitched a Breakfast Club remake with the children of the main characters as the new detention students. Plus maybe Bender returning as a Vernon-like character.

Yep. Aside from Ally Sheedy's character (who would never date that wrestler doofus in real life), the only other redeemable character from that movie is Carl.

I agree and almost mentioned the same thing. I was a part time janitor at an elementary/middle school during college in the early 90s, for about two years. I was the eyes and ears of that institution.