Yeah I know someone who had her life turned upside down by a family member who abused her. I found out years later, and it was never reported. Why some family members who know what happened still talk to him is beyond me. He's a cancerous old fuck now and the world will be better off without him.JennyB wrote: ↑06 Feb 2023, 6:38pmThank you. It's been awful. I spoke to VH, Jr. about it when it first came out and he swore he was never alone with him, thankfully. I am just still shocked and disgusted. He ruined the life of that girl, who probably just got finished playing with barbie dolls, and destroyed her whole family's lives as well. It's so damn sad.matedog wrote: ↑06 Feb 2023, 5:13pmEesh, the circling of the wagons is pretty awful on that. If a family member did something that reprehensible, I'd like to think I'd turn my back on them immediately. I'm definitely not loyal to a fault. And that sounds like an awful thing to go through on your end, but it sounds like you are completely doing the right thing.JennyB wrote: ↑06 Feb 2023, 11:23am
So, we are dealing with a similar situation with a (now former) friend. This is someone who was at my wedding and at VH, Jr.'s bar mitzvah. He had two 13-year-old daughters and a 10-year-old son and has been married to his wife for 15 years.
I get a text from him a couple of months ago asking if I had time to talk. I told him that I was getting ready to leave for a conference in Chicago, but was everything OK? He said no. So I immediately thought he was going to say someone was sick or that he was getting a divorce or something.
I call him back and he tells me he has gotten himself into a bit of trouble. He has an internet porn addiction and it "resulted" in him trading pictures with someone underage. He asked if I could write a letter on his behalf for the judge, because he will be going to prison for at least five years. I said I could not do that - I worked in sexual abuse prevention for 11 years and as a social worker, I am a mandated reporter. At this time I kind of felt bad for him because he made it sound like the person in the picture was 17 and he was hoodwinked (which is bad enough). But, still.
Turns out, she was 11. And he actively solicited pictures of her. And he is still trying to claim this is due to an addiction. Which is absolute bullshit. Then I read the victim impact statement and he not only posed as another 11 year old girl, he used videos of other 11 year old victims to pose as another 11 year old girl. I won't get into the details of the things he made his victim do, but it was one of the most disturbing things I have ever read.
To complicate things even further, his mom is on the board of my agency. We had a board retreat a couple of months ago and she stood up in front of the group to tell this sob story about how her son has an addiction and it's not his fault and what kind of parents let their children on these websites anyway? I was livid. LIVID. I get that you are in total denial, but this was so inappropriate. She's resigning from the board, but that's not enough. And she keeps trying to get me to sit down and talk with her. Which is harassment and my boss isn't doing shit about it.
There were a few red flags, but hindsight makes them clearer. One time, another couple, VH and I were at their house for dinner. Their son was all over my the wife in the other couple (he was like 7 at the time) - trying to kiss her and hug her excessively. What did he say about his son? Not "hands to yourself" or something, but he said "look at my little ladies man." It was so gross. There was another time when his daughter hit a boy and he said "ha ha your kid got his ass kicked by a girl." We just chalked all of this up to insecurity, but now we realized there was something far more sinister about his attitude.
Anyway, sorry for the long rant. This was my very long winded way in saying that I agree with Flex - while I loathe the prison system, I'm willing to make an exception in the case of people like Gary Glitter and our former friend.
The Dictator observations thread.
Re: The Dictator observations thread.
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
I think it's (at least in part) a coping mechanism to deal with a sense of guilt at not stopping it/not seeing signs/etc. If this family member is somehow "redeemable" or worth staying in contact with, then maybe what happened right under their nose isn't as monstrous as it really was.revbob wrote: ↑06 Feb 2023, 7:56pmYeah I know someone who had her life turned upside down by a family member who abused her. I found out years later, and it was never reported. Why some family members who know what happened still talk to him is beyond me. He's a cancerous old fuck now and the world will be better off without him.
My armchair psychology of it, anyways.
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a bowl of soup
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
Pex Lives!
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
Pex Lives!
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
In The Boss' extended family, there was a great uncle who sexually abused in some manner (I never sought to understand the details) her sister. It was an open secret in the family and was discussed in coded language, with indirect warnings to not let him be alone with any of the girls. But no one would truly address any of it. Partly because (I'm guessing) he was quite elderly and because it was about not drawing attention to a greater family shame. When he died, both the Boss and her sister inherited a lot of money (he was a wealthy farmer with no children). I know the Boss felt conflicted, but I told her, fuck it, the inheritance doesn't mean forgiving him. But it's a tough thing for people to discuss because (again I'm guessing) what gets changed by open acknowledgement?
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
Yeah that shit’s pretty much unforgivable.
Last edited by Kimmelweck on 13 Feb 2023, 5:41am, edited 1 time in total.
The chair is against the wall. The chair is against the wall. John has a long mustache. John has a long mustache.
Re: The Dictator observations thread.
And people are worried about drag queens.
Got a Rake? Sure!
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
Yeah. The heteronormative, patriarchal nuclear family has been the primary bastion to both perpetuate and mask abuse for as long as it's been a thing.
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a bowl of soup
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
Pex Lives!
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
Pex Lives!
Re: The Dictator observations thread.
Exactly, all "fine upstanding members of the community".
I think Ive mentioned my own experience that turned out ok for me, it never dawned on to me until much later what my one uncle might have done to me had he caught me. Beat me at best I suppose.
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
A convenient and purposeful distraction from the real monsters that lurk.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
https://www.yesmagazine.org/economy/202 ... rica-angry
Longish piece on socio-economic conditions in a deep red small town in Oklahoma. How do you get people to channel their legitimate anger (against structures and systems, that is) in ways where they can aspire for something better rather than just pointlessly rage?
Longish piece on socio-economic conditions in a deep red small town in Oklahoma. How do you get people to channel their legitimate anger (against structures and systems, that is) in ways where they can aspire for something better rather than just pointlessly rage?
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
- Dr. Medulla
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
Didn't really know where else to put this, but it's pretty decent work:
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
Re: The Dictator observations thread.
A lot of mean old codgers there.Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑19 Feb 2023, 8:31pmDidn't really know where else to put this, but it's pretty decent work:
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
That's pretty neatDr. Medulla wrote: ↑19 Feb 2023, 8:31pmDidn't really know where else to put this, but it's pretty decent work:
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a bowl of soup
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
Pex Lives!
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
Pex Lives!
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Silent Majority
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
Very cool.
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Re: The Dictator observations thread.
I like how they all look fairly realistic except for George W. Bush, who just looks like a fucking muppet.
The chair is against the wall. The chair is against the wall. John has a long mustache. John has a long mustache.
Re: The Dictator observations thread.
Jefferson looks like SUCH a dick.
Got a Rake? Sure!
IMCT: Inane Middle-Class Twats - Dr. M
" *sigh* it's right when they throw the penis pump out the window." -Hoy
IMCT: Inane Middle-Class Twats - Dr. M
" *sigh* it's right when they throw the penis pump out the window." -Hoy